when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
