babies were throwing up all over the place
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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