i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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