I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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