Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
