you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Randomize
