YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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