I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
