That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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