4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
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