Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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