I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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