i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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