She's JV to your varsity
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.