you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize