I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
