I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
