how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize