So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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