Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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