I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
