4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
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