If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
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