Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
