My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
