Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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