AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
