I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize