Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
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