I faked an abortion last night.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Randomize
