Texts From Last Night

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  (316): View more from Kansas

  Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair

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  (316): Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair http://tfl.nu/yhl2
  Replies (20) Good night (812) Bad night (4111)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  my text book just quoted the cookie monster

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  (613): my text book just quoted the cookie monster http://tfl.nu/5m8t
  Replies (24) Good night (8487) Bad night (829)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?

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  (770): Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead? http://tfl.nu/xbgb
  Replies (29) Good night (2447) Bad night (4899)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.

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  (920): I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night. http://tfl.nu/zpas
  Replies (11) Good night (3886) Bad night (2273)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.

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  (334): A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown. http://tfl.nu/tag1
  Replies (5) Good night (1030) Bad night (1724)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!

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  (406): Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you! http://tfl.nu/h6a1
  Replies (2) Good night (1188) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (587): View more from Alberta

  Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.

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  (587): Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch. http://tfl.nu/ad1t
  Replies (6) Good night (2381) Bad night (816)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.

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  (253): I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE. http://tfl.nu/sorm
  Replies (7) Good night (1800) Bad night (647)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.

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  (717): Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend. http://tfl.nu/7j2q
  Replies (10) Good night (1460) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I ate you ate to the whole david gray album

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  (631): I ate you ate to the whole david gray album http://tfl.nu/r321
  Replies (6) Good night (514) Bad night (712)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  There's a naked man in my car right now.

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  (903): There's a naked man in my car right now. http://tfl.nu/6qzb
  Replies (6) Good night (748) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want

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  (804): That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want http://tfl.nu/mjof
  Replies (3) Good night (605) Bad night (233)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.

  (541): View more from Oregon

  We need to stop going to pet stores high.

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  (541): I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone. (541): We need to stop going to pet stores high. http://tfl.nu/99st
  Replies (1) Good night (536) Bad night (381)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.

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  (408): Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard. http://tfl.nu/3g4r
  Replies (3) Good night (297) Bad night (118)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's

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  (775): It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's http://tfl.nu/5kzf
  Replies (0) Good night (46) Bad night (293)

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