Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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