Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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