Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I have feelings that need drinking.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
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