My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize