operation harelip BJ is a go
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
