Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
