Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone. http://tfl.nu/eom9
  Replies (4) Good night (707) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way http://tfl.nu/08qt
  Replies (22) Good night (9372) Bad night (1327)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue http://tfl.nu/p7ux
  Replies (5) Good night (4563) Bad night (1036)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you. http://tfl.nu/fb35
  Replies (24) Good night (1955) Bad night (5518)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea. http://tfl.nu/v4ue
  Replies (10) Good night (4499) Bad night (1275)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore. http://tfl.nu/0dve
  Replies (25) Good night (1513) Bad night (3160)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle. http://tfl.nu/aejf
  Replies (1) Good night (689) Bad night (1354)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.

  (1-989): View more from Michigan

  You did this to yourself.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation. (1-989): You did this to yourself. http://tfl.nu/o89r
  Replies (11) Good night (1699) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times. http://tfl.nu/ij34
  Replies (4) Good night (2506) Bad night (711)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy. http://tfl.nu/0mlh
  Replies (14) Good night (2443) Bad night (1029)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever. http://tfl.nu/x84m
  Replies (15) Good night (2717) Bad night (776)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night. http://tfl.nu/q0pz
  Replies (2) Good night (1163) Bad night (566)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again. http://tfl.nu/2r7a
  Replies (2) Good night (764) Bad night (1086)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes. http://tfl.nu/t9et
  Replies (8) Good night (396) Bad night (1182)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night http://tfl.nu/8l7b
  Replies (1) Good night (355) Bad night (460)

Randomize