Texts From Last Night

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  (702): View more from Nevada

  **** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha

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  (702): **** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha http://tfl.nu/p7u5
  Replies (4) Good night (876) Bad night (718)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  what does that even mean?

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.

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  (610): yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night. (215): what does that even mean? (610): you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life. http://tfl.nu/owon
  Replies (36) Good night (5513) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.

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  (360): She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt. http://tfl.nu/1my8
  Replies (20) Good night (1443) Bad night (2916)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.

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  (973): we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical. http://tfl.nu/h352
  Replies (131) Good night (14565) Bad night (3122)
• Favorite

  (325): View more from Texas

  Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...

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  (325): Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on... http://tfl.nu/mq0s
  Replies (42) Good night (1351) Bad night (6709)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.

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  (619): His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini. http://tfl.nu/6erh
  Replies (9) Good night (4622) Bad night (1318)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before

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  (404): I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before http://tfl.nu/47j4
  Replies (16) Good night (3797) Bad night (1369)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms

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  (804): you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms http://tfl.nu/vyht
  Replies (4) Good night (3909) Bad night (897)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call

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  (330): I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call http://tfl.nu/x7fj
  Replies (10) Good night (1982) Bad night (644)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?

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  (717): How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling? http://tfl.nu/pzfw
  Replies (7) Good night (1675) Bad night (456)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.

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  (608): I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever. http://tfl.nu/xcdq
  Replies (10) Good night (1201) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.

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  (360): He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning. http://tfl.nu/j239
  Replies (0) Good night (657) Bad night (1074)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  I don't wanna be gay for a night.

  (850): View more from Florida

  I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.

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  (208): I don't wanna be gay for a night. (850): I think it would be worth it for free alcohol. http://tfl.nu/uvi0
  Replies (2) Good night (976) Bad night (721)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.

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  (503): Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun. http://tfl.nu/5we2
  Replies (2) Good night (891) Bad night (349)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.

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  (303): The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain. http://tfl.nu/vbjk
  Replies (1) Good night (446) Bad night (410)

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