i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
