Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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