Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
