Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
