BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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