sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
