So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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