I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
