just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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