Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
