all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
