Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
you traded sex for a burrito?
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
