69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
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