kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
