i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
