ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize